There’s no way to make weeding feel like anything other than punishment. You can reward yourself with a glass of rosé on the patio afterward or work in some squats and pretend it’s a workout, but when you’re tugging at that stubborn greater plantain that’s sprouted up (again) between cracks in the path to your front door, it. Just. Sucks.
Especially two weeks later, when those weeds you’ve just fought from the earth have creeped back, leaves curling upward like a giant middle finger to you and all of your hard work. But there’s a way to get revenge. You just need a weed torch.
Yes, that’s right — a weed torch. Flame Engineering makes an entire series of these handheld propane torches, which you can use to gently scorch your lawn-killing enemies. Naturally, you might have questions: How do you use that thing without accidentally setting your yard on fire?! Does it really work?!
First things first: You don’t have to have a scorched-earth policy to kill weeds. “You know you’re successful when the weed changes from a glossy to a matte finish,” Tom Lanine, weed ecologist at the University of California at Davis, told Garden.org. (We’re talking holding the flame over a weed for about a tenth of a second here, though you should follow the brand’s instructions about what to do.) “The weed may not droop immediately but will wilt and die within a few hours. Then you just leave the weed to compost naturally.”
Secondly, yes, it does work. Reviewers on YouTube swear by how quickly it kills weeds — and does so without using any chemicals. Tougher weeds sometimes need a second or third pass, particularly if they’ve grown to gargantuan size. You can see it in action here:
It’s enough to make me give it a try — even if only for the twisted satisfaction of giving those brutal weeds in my yard their just deserts.
Credit: housebeautiful.com
